As an only child of an immigrant, lower-middle class, family from China, I was always told that education comes first. And only if I could succeed in grade school would I be admitted into a prestigious university, and then be offered a good job. Since elementary school back in China, it was engrained in me that I needed to receive highest scores on exams and report cards in order to succeed. Once, I had received a 98 on one of my math final exams. The response from one of my family members was, “Why didn’t you get 100? You were so close. What a disappointment.” This eventually led to the thought process that I had to be perfect and that success and perfection come from the self. Now that I have come to the States, this mentality, combined with my parents who worked long hours, formed in me the habit of studying, playing, or having meals alone. During my high school years, I hit the point where I could entertain myself perfectly and I was indifferent about having other people being a part of my life.

I entered college with the same set of expectations. During my early college career, I walked into class, took notes, studied hard, and strived to get A’s in all of my classes. And it worked. I achieved the grades and got the right scores. That’s why I never would have thought that during my junior and senior year of college I would get completely rocked: the grades just were not coming, despite my efforts.

But it was during this time that God worked in my life by changing my paradigm from individual-focused to community-focused. And this came through my involved at Harvest Mission Community Church. I realized that living a life alone could be refreshing and lead to the accomplishments of many tasks. However, involving others and being part of a community allowed me to develop meaningful and intimate friendships with a diverse group of people, to whom I could reach out and share times of pain, happiness, and joy.

Church brings many socially and intellectually diverse people into one tight-knit community, where members are able to share painful (or happy) stories without feeling judged, love one another at a deeper level, and embrace one another’s differences.

One of my greatest experiences of community at church has been spending time with my fellow classmates, nick named “Roots.” Since my classmates and I are in the same stage in life and in our college careers, there are many questions and struggles that we share, and that together we are able to impact one another through speech and action. As individuals and as a class, we have been tested through times of family restructuring, death of a friend or a family member, and periods of academic or career shorting comings. Yet, many times we are able to pray and intercede for each another, guide and counsel one another, or simply share fun times of creaming people on their birthdays. In addition, through the friendships that I have developed, I have been able to gain hobbies and knowledge (e.g. sports and musical talents). This is all because we are united in Christ and that we are a community of believers that have been built with God’s grace to love, embrace, and forgive one another, and that if one person is made stronger, the entire body of Christ is stronger.

And through this community, God has sovereignty brought me into His kingdom and has allowed me to reap many of the fruits. Although on most days, I still need time to myself, I value other people and our relationships more than I have ever before. God has opened my eyes to the people, the community, and the world to comprehend that success and leadership are not only setting high standards for my self and achieving them, but also acting with wisdom, influencing people, and building a wide network of friends. I cherish this gift and epiphany from God.